Ping Pong: Action Sport or Bust
by: Nathaniel Cook
As previously reported, Empire is actively seeking a Ping-Pong player to add to its stable of athletes. So far, being somewhat limited to a domestic (US) search has kept the pool of talent rather shallow. While the sport is growing stateside, most of the heavy paddlers are overseas, and therefore, difficult to sign. However, with our team, including our incomparable Team Manager, Brian Schroy, and fearless executive, Otto Hanson, working behind the scenes, we’ve managed to find a few candidates.
Our dream is to ultimately find an athlete to add to Empire’s already dynamic team. The ideal candidate would bring the same dedication, focus, and competitive edge to their craft as our skiers do. To us, Ping-Pong is an art, a display of the peaks of human potential, afforded to its viewership through sheer will and providence. The idea of a world class Ping-Pong player, eyes narrowed, paddle firmly in hands, coolly knocking out opponents while sporting our gear is just too good for us to pass up. In fact, we are so caught in the image of a Ping-Pong player joining up with Empire that our team will be travelling to China this fall to scout some of the best talent in the world.
Far from beyond reproach, we here at Empire are curious what our customers and fans think of this move. While our intentions are pure, we know that the act could be equally foolhardy; spending the coin to track down an obscure sports icon in the Orient could prove more difficult than finding Bobby Fischer (he was hiding in Iceland the whole time). More to the point, it may be that the action sports world just isn’t ready to embrace Ping-Pong into its lexicon.
So, to our readers and fans, we pose these questions. Are you ready to see a Ping-Pong player on the Empire lineup? Are Ping-Pong players Gods amongst men? Do they really have no shadows? Could they beat us at beer pong as well? Is it too soon…
what the pong? July 8, 2011 at 11:42 pm
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kdD14xAgyRo
Otto July 9, 2011 at 8:30 am
Thanks for posting this video What the Pong. This is a great example of the athletic prowess and sheer ACTION of the sport in question.
Owen July 9, 2011 at 9:58 am
Otto will be the first to tell you that my marketing skills are not of the highest caliber, but I can’t say that I agree with the ping pong chase. Your image, with the big ‘blingy’ E and the current clientele being cool BMXers and snowboarders and skiers and stuff, seems a far cry from the world of ping pong. Diversification is great but you guys aren’t big enough yet to sell apples AND oranges; maybe instead of just selling FIJI apples you can sell FIJI and Gala apples ya know?
Just my meager opinion. Maybe a college basketball player? (is that even legal?) Hockey? Skateboarding? Break-dancers or other street-dance-type people? Or those people who go around jumping and flipping off walls and park benches and stuff? (do they exist on the professional level?) Something more hip and more US-based.
best of luck,
admin July 10, 2011 at 7:02 am
Thanks for the input Owen. We may well end up branching into other, more established sports soon. I like break-dancing as an idea. We’ll look into it.
As far as the cool factor, we’re operating under our own pretense, which is that few sports carry the levity, oddness, and fun of Ping-Pong. I think this makes it pretty cool, and, hence, of interest to us. The difficulty, as mentioned, is finding someone to sign stateside, but we think that a couple of international jaunts will be worth the effort.
Thanks for getting back to us, and lending your far more than meager opinion. Keep tuning in to get an update on our successes and failures on the matter.
N.C.
what the pong July 9, 2011 at 11:28 am
The clip was from the US Nationals, we thought two good US candidates for you to take a look at.
admin July 10, 2011 at 7:03 am
Thanks for the suggestion! We’ll make sure to check these guys out more throughly, and keep you updated on all our vetting processes.
N.C.